This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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