Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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