Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
