Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
