I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize