brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
