I can text with my tongue
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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