Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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