got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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