He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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