gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
