I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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