Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
