and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
