My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize