do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize