Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
