Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize