trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
