i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
