It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
