nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
