And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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