I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
