Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
