he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
