There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
