Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Farmville is her only friend.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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