I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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