All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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