Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
did you just send me my own nude
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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