She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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