trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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