He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
