i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
you had me at cake vodka
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
