Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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