butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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