he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Randomize
