im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
