but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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