real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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