I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
