I heard we made out
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
