Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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