It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
