She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
420 ftw
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
