ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
