dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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