you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I take back everything I said about communal showers
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
