My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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