And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
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