Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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